4:06
“Time of death, 4:06 pm.”
When heaven and earth have a picnic, a lot of things don’t make sense from the outside.
Norah’s life was our first ‘picnic.’ When my breath would slow just enough for me to look around, I found we were often surrounded by what I call ‘heaven winks’. Our list of moments which could’ve only been set in place by God himself could pen a novel rivaling those of the greats. It’s hard to accurately describe what it’s like to experience a heaven wink – the way they encourage your heart to keep beating, your feet to take one more step. They’re a lot like picking up one of our girls and holding them tight, regardless of if they came running to me with open arms, if I gathered them up while playing tag, or after learning something the hard way. It’s connection, it’s medicine, it’s love.
In the heavy silence of our NICU room, the doctor put his stethoscope back around his neck, uttered a soft condolence and walked out the door. Looking through the window from the hallway, you would’ve seen two young parents holding the lifeless body of their child. But if you looked closer, you would’ve seen the tears rolling down my cheeks take a detour around the tiniest hint of a smile.
My first words to Lane after the doctor left were, “Isn’t 406 an engine build?”
At 4:07, we laughed.
In a basic sense, 406 refers to a specific size of engine. There are several common sizes - 383, 350, 400, etc. One of the games we’d play with friends while we were dating was to name engine builds. Lane knew the list of sizes like many people know sports stats, so I learned them quickly since I wanted to know him.
Lane’s love for anything with horsepower has only intensified as we’ve gotten older and my library of absorbed shop knowledge has grown in parallel. When we heard 4:06, there was no research required; those three numbers landed on our hearts like a letter delivered straight from heaven with a Lane-themed stamp.
We laughed harder at the absurdity of the moment, how insane we must’ve seemed to anyone walking by – laughing and discussing engines in a room marked by the death of a child.
Sometimes ‘the peace that passes understanding’ involves a little bit of shoptalk.
A couple months ago, those three little numbers came into focus again. One of our fellow drag racers mentioned to Lane that he was looking to sell his engine. Lane has been looking to for another mechanical puzzle to piece together, for years but we’ve never found one to pull the trigger on. I’ll spare you the specifications included on his wish list, but this one happened to check all the boxes.
It wasn’t a hard sell; it’s a 406.
406 has been etched into my soul since that silent NICU room, but this spring I just couldn’t get those numbers out of my head. Once I finally stopped trying to shove them back into mental storage, I was met with a quiet invitation to explore. Thanks to my psychological power couple (ADHD + grief) I packed up my numbers and hiked into a rabbit hole. Naturally, God met me at every turn.
(If you’re into rabbit holes, read below)
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Not only is 406 Norah’s time of death and the build of our newest engine, 406 has some other interesting connections:
406 is the area code for the entire state of Montana
406mhz is the specific frequency of an emergency distress beacon.
4 of 6 of our babies are in heaven.
406 doesn't have a specific reference in the Bible, but 40 often refers to a time of testing, trial, or transition, and 6 is frequently connected with humanity and imperfection.
I read every verse in the Bible that’s 4:06 or 40:6, and each one stood out for different reasons. (A couple favorites: Isaiah 40:6, 2 Corinthians 4:6)
In Revelation 4, the 4 living creatures that surround God’s heavenly throne each have 6 eyes.
The same God that met us in those three little numbers in that silent NICU room embraced us just down the hall. The Ronald McDonald House acted as the hands and feet of God. If heaven and earth were having a picnic, the RMH jumped right in and provided the meal. Our experience at the Ronald McDonald House during Norah’s life is more precious than gold, and we’ll continue to support their mission to support families like ours as long as we can.
The Family Walk for the Ronald McDonald House - Upper Midwest is August 16th, and Team Norah fundraising continues through the end of September. Join us in person, walk wherever you are, or simply grab some gear and support families like ours! Scroll down to see the options.
A few logistical things have shifted, so if you’ve bought shirts previously, note that they’re no longer being sold in batches, so no more waiting for your gear!
Team Norah for RMH 2025
This year, Team Norah is embracing 406.
It’s a simple reminder that nothing stops God from hugging his kids. He’s writing a story and the entire universe is His pen. The 406 design will only be available during this 2025 fundraising season (now through the end of September).
Official Team Norah shirts
These are on a high quality, lightweight shirt, perfect for joining us at the RMH Family Walk on August 16th. These will be the official team shirts moving forward, like a jersey.
And last but certainly not least, Lora wants to join in on the fundraising efforts! Lora has made a handful of 8”x8” heart-themed paintings and is selling them for $20 each with every dollar from the sales going to the RMH for Team Norah. We’re calling them Lora’s HEARTworks. If you’re interested, send me a message below and I’ll connect with you to coordinate payment & delivery.
As always, if you would like to join us in person at the walk or donate directly to RMH as part of Team Norah - you can do so through our team page.
On behalf of all RMH families - thank you.
XOXO
– Joanna
